The first time I saw Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, circa 1976, I was driving to or driving from New York. We stopped in to see Dino, a schoolmate from Marquette. I was immediately enamored with this charming little city. I had expected something so very different.

I knew my grade school geography. Pittsburgh was synonymous with steel mills and dirty air. We arrived at Dino’s apartment somewhere in the city (three times there and I’m still lost most of the time) and I recall being surprised by the pretty architecture in the neighborhood and even more confused by the hilly sidewalks we had to climb here and there. I guess when I thought “industry” I thought it would be like Hammond and Gary, Indiana – flat, endless low buildings and smog. I still am not sure where the old steel mills can be found.

As I write this I recall it was Christmastime – Dino had his Christmas cards posted up around doorways and we listened to Art Garfunkel without Paul Simon. Dino showed us around a bit – we didn’t have much time – and I got a look at a city that reminded me of San Francisco. At the time of course I had only been to SF once and did not ever expect to make it my home. Some people leave their hearts in San Francisco – I left mine in that little Appalachian metropolis, but it would be a good twenty five years before I would return.

The second time was just after 9/11. I had missed the previous summer’s Marquette reunion due to a miscommunication between Al and me. He thought I didn’t want to go, I thought he didn’t want to go, so neither of us went. Turns out, we both had wanted to go. Such is communication in young marriages. That would never happen after 29 years. When Dino regaled me with the tales of the reunion, I had an overwhelming desire to see my old friend and lovely little Pittsburgh, so off I went. The reservations were made before 9/11 but I was not afraid to fly. I had the attitude that there was probably no safer time to fly than right after planes went back up in the air.

By then Dino had purchased a home on Reynolds street, in a little neighborhood, oh damn I’ve already forgotten the name – I’m hopeless. Squirrel Hill? No, I just looked it up, Point Breeze, of course. Dino’s place is a block away from Frick Park and the tiny but world class Frick Museum. (I looked up Henry Frick and he was a steel magnate who was a real SOB and often called the “most hated man in America,” but who left a legacy to the city of Pittsburgh of 600 acres of parkland and as mentioned, world class European artwork, furniture and tapestries. Guess he felt guilty.)

When I visited in 2001 the apartment was living space on one side and another open side that could be used for commercial use – a cafe/gathering spot is Dino’s dream – and a little courtyard and backyard. Dino lived there with his Dad who has since passed away. My visit then was as it was this time – with many friendly and interesting folks ambling in and out of the house, great food and conversation, ever present Appalachian flavored music floating from the radio. Driving through the neighborhoods and surrounding countryside, each turn prettier than the last in the October sunlight.

I was also present for the neighborhood bonfire, held in the schoolyard right across the street from Dino’s place. I left Pittsburgh even more convinced that it is one of the prettiest and most underrated cities in the country. Friendly people, down home values that bend a little liberal but are also vaguely conservative. Sounds like me, all right!

It would be another nine years before I would return, just overdue for a visit to a city that nourishes my soul. We had a busy agenda this time – to begin planning the next Marquette reunion of our friends for the year 2011. We had a wonderful time connecting with old friends and making them promise to save the date. We are on a mission to find a few of our core group who have managed to remain hidden, to convince them that life is short, that some friendships are enduring, and that we miss them.

Since the last time, Dino had become an ordained Interfaith Minister and I had the pleasure of witnessing him perform a wedding on a Pennsylvania farm. A huge renovated barn was the centerpiece of the country estate, the ceremony itself was held under a gazebo by a pond, which reflected the autumn colors and still green rolling hills that couched the pond and sported dirt and gravel lanes. The bride was spotted far off in a horse drawn carriage that carried her down the lane and delivered her to the gazebo. Everyone was astounded as her father assisted her off the carriage, and a flock of noisy geese AND ducks flew directly overhead. I admit I was watching for bird dropping disaster but they simply flew overhead. A good omen for this couple, for sure!

The next day found us getting some exercise along the Allegheny Riverfront in Pittsburgh. Within spitting distance a Steelers game was in progress and along the waterfront people had moored their boats, unloaded grills and tables and TVs. The roar of Steeler’s touchdowns on the warm October day could be heard left and right. The rest of the city was across the river, and beyond that the neighborhoods and hills that define the charm of Pittsburgh.

Along the way Dino pointed out the old Heinz factory, now gentrified lofts and apartments. Later I would see the same re-use of the Nabisco bakery. Just outside of the Steeler’s home stadium is a sculpture of Mister Rogers. It is a rather ghastly likeness and it takes a few walks around to see any resemblance at all, but it’s the thought that counts. We conversed with a couple of young ladies from upstate New York who were in for a wedding as well, and we all agreed that Pittsburgh is a city surprising in its appeal.

Another evening ensued of food and wine and various and sundry characters who feel at home at Dino’s house. The commercial side of the apartment is used for a resale shop, what used to be the living area is now kind of a no man’s land, and on the other side of that is an apartment I didn’t know existed where Dino lives now. The whole weekend the resale shop was having a “courtyard sale” in the side yard, so there was much hustle and bustle of people wandering in and out. I only found one item I couldn’t live without – a shawl festooned with two glorious beaded peacocks.

The first night I was there after the shop was closed down for the night, Dino wanted me to peek in and see all the stuff, but I wouldn’t – there were only a few night lights on and with all the old stuff in there I just point blank told him I was scared because there were ghosts in there. He assured me there were indeed ghosts in the house and I had to try to forget that when I tried to sleep that night. Outside ghosts are one thing. Inside ghosts are a completely different story!

A few days later he complained that although it was beneficial for him to rent out that space to Angie, all the stuff bugged him. I explained to him that it wasn’t “stuff.” It was all things that people had touched, had used, contained history. Each hat and scarf had been worn, each cup had been cradled in someone’s hands, each book had been opened and read, each ring had been worn. He now understood why I was afraid to go in – there were ghosts in there indeed! Angie was happy that I had taught Dino that lesson, and he was pleased that he truly understood now the appeal of all that junk!

The weekend was full of people and conversations that filled my soul. I missed the bonfire this year by one week, but did make it up to Mount Washington, where I had a bird’s eye view of the little hamlet of Pittsburgh, the Allegheny and Monongahela Rivers joining to form the Ohio just below me.

The next day it was time to leave again. I will try not to wait nine years to return, and think I should go during the summer some time. We made a little foray to the area of University of Pittsburgh and the Carnegie library, architecture of Pittsburgh’s heyday on every street. Next time I will spend more time really investigating the rich history of this area.

I left with less sadness this time, knowing that Pittburgh nestled that little piece of my heart in it’s ancient hills after the last two visits, and I trust it will again keep it safe until next time!