I should have known.  My wonderful little home health agency that has been allowing me to create my own job announced yesterday that it is being “acquired” by a monster health care giant.  I knew this would happen, of course, because I have been jumping from one mom-and-pop operation to another for years.  Then when things become unbearably corporate I walk away.  Hopefully this time I will have half a chance.

Of course I have heard the drill many times.  “We are very excited because we think Mom and Pop’s Home Health Care is a great fit and a wonderful addition to our company.”  “This is such a successful and respected company in the community, we are anxious to tap into your experience and learn from you.” (Gag me, please.)  “We are not planning on laying anyone off.” (Yet).

Sigh.  I was so bummed out yesterday I decided to replace the right rear tail light assembly on my Subaru, which had been broken for a year.  The replacement had arrived in the mail yesterday, so I figured it would make me feel better.

It all started out well.  The actual piece which I had purchased on Ebay and had not realized included part of the painted body of the car,  by some miracle actually matched the color of my car.  Unscrew a nut and bolt.  No problem   Unscrew another nut and bolt.  Problem.  I began to learn why, as Andy stated later, he used to throw tools across the carport when he was replacing half the engine on the Eclipse years ago.  We now have something to bond over, he and I.  Yes, indeedy, the socket wrench thingy won’t fit over the nut because the bolt is too long.  OK, here’s a long one the same size.  Oh.  You can’t fit the longer socket wrench into the tight space where the nut is located.  I realized right around this point that I needed to put on some gloves to protect my pretty pink nail polish.

Enter crowbar and sledge hammer that fulfills a double duty of ripping the old tail light assembly off and venting my anger at the company takeover.  It still took me an hour to get the thing off.  The added fun was due to the fact that there was one piece firmly attached to the assembly that needed to be included in the replacement, and I couldn’t just rip that off willy-nilly.

The best part was, of course, the sledge hammer.  When crowbarring stopped working and I still didn’t have enough room to get that nut off from the inside, it was time to just start wailing on it.

Andy said I did a really nice job.  He put the new one back on for me. My car looks less like Jed Clampett’s now, although I am still waiting for the right front headlight assembly to replace that.  I know what you’re thinking, but it wasn’t all me.  I was responsible for the right front dent when when my Subaru Sport was totaled by a guy side-swiping me – thankfully I wasn’t totaled – and this replacement used Subaru Forester has the exact same dashboard set up – so when I took the sharp turn into the carport that requires gunning it to get up the hill – well, I forgot I was in a bigger version of that dashboard and caught the retaining wall.   The back right tail light Jeff can tell you about.  The back left dent (thankfully no tail light issues) was Andy backing out of the carport and not noticing that there was another car there.  Leave me alone now.  It takes a family.

Today I feel much better about the whole work thing.  I have talked to some friends and advisors and plan to just continue one step at a time.  People at work have loved what I’m doing in each “hat” I am wearing, so for at least the time being I am safe.  In the meantime I am further defining what I will be when I grow up – computer training?  Workplace general trainer?  Public speaking/community liason?  Health professional educator?  I’m just going to let it all fall into place and keep my eyes, ears and heart open.  I will be and do what I’m supposed to be and do.

Maybe auto body repair.