It started maybe three years ago. Covid was over. I had missed my family – Joe in Denver, Andy in Virginia, Jeff in Minnesota.

It was becoming more evident to me that despite my fantasy of the “kids” coming home all at one time to utilize the spacious home we bought overlooking the ocean, it was impractical for them to do so. They are adults. They have lives. To expect them to spend their time off traveling for a full day on either side of a vacation, and to do it at Christmastime, and all at the same time was just that – a fantasy.

Moreover, I missed the Midwest. I missed deciduous trees. I missed the seasons. I missed the people. I missed the lakes. I missed my kids. I felt like I was just existing. I had acquaintances, rode my bike on Sundays, played mahjong, but still, something was missing. Something essential.

Al, in the meantime, was happy as a clam. He was golfing with his pals every Sunday. He was retired and loved sitting on the patio from morning til night reading, no matter the weather. Despite the reputation California has for fun in the sun, coastal living is temperamental, with it being chilly more frequently than it is surfin’ USA. Even in the summer the ocean was cold – less so than in Northern California but still required a wetsuit for any type of prolonged ocean activity – one of the reasons I stopped scuba diving was the exertion of putting on a 7 mm wetsuit wiped me out before I even got in the water.

To say that Al was less than enthusiastic about the idea of moving is an understatement. It required marriage counseling and finally a decision on my part. I was going with or without him. To be fair, I had chosen to “follow” Al from Illinois to San Francisco, from the city of San Francisco to the suburb of Lafayette (not my favorite placed I’ve ever lived but a “wonderful place to raise kids”), to Southern California. I don’t take kindly to regrets. Even the most awful experiences in my life I have chalked up to lessons learned at worst or the start of a new adventure at best. Nearing age 70, it was my turn to go and Al’s turn to follow if he chose to do so. I truly started to feel that if I didn’t get back to the Midwest I was going to regret it on my deathbed. That was a deal I was not willing to make.

Al and I have been married for 43 years now. It is not because it has all been a bed of roses of course, but we agree that we are both a couple of good eggs. Because Al is a good egg and I guess because he thinks I am, he finally relented. It was an incredible amount of work on his part, as he is the quintessential “finance” guy and it required him to manage our funds until we could sell California. He did it expertly but not without what seemed like an interminable lousy mood.

In October of 2023, our search for a condo in Minneapolis yielded a miracle when this three bedroom condo in a 55+ building popped up for a sell-it-now price. All we really could afford up to that point had been a one bedroom, not very nice ones at that and in so-so locations. It is my happy place for sure. Two blocks from one of the three lakes in the city limits of Minneapolis, 15 minutes from Jeff and Raina and now Obie. We moved in April of 2024. There is a story about that which is a blog entry I will get to.

The day we arrived the kids announced that I had 7 months to make a baby quilt as Raina was pregnant. This was, to be honest, a major reason I wanted to be here. Jeff and Raina openly wanted kids, the other two sons not so much. I wanted to have a “room of my own” – where my winter coats would not have to be schlepped in each time, where the grandkid toys would have a closet in which to be stored. It all came true. I met mahjong players almost immediately and they are all good Democrats and surrounded me with friendship like only Midwesterners can. The lilacs were blooming when we arrived, the fall colors came on cue in October and snow came in November. There was only one problem. We could not stay in California as a primary residence. Where to go? I will tell you, but first I must chronicle how we got to Minnesota…